The sun finally shows up in full force, and I’ve been couch-bound for two days now.
Waking up yesterday, I immediately felt off. It was like my vision was lagging—everything was slow and distorted. I couldn’t figure it out at first. It felt like I’d been drugged... or like when I was recovering from my TBI and my eyes couldn’t track properly. I got up and took a shower, hoping it might snap me out of it, but it didn’t. I was dizzy and afraid of falling over.
Since then, I’ve been hydrating like crazy and trying my hardest to rest.
I don’t know why, but I never thought vertigo was something that could happen to me. It wasn’t even on my radar. But it definitely explains why I haven’t really been able to walk a straight line.
Thankfully, today’s been better than yesterday. I’m hopeful that trend continues. As someone who writes daily, and who reads almost as much as he writes, I can tell you with the utmost confidence that this sucks. Because it’s hard to do either of those things while the room’s spinning.
All the while, the quote “if you don’t schedule a break, your body will do it for you” is reverberating through my head. That, and the U2 song, Vertigo. Which, by the way, I’m not even convinced is that great of a song... their deal with Apple that landed them on every iPod by default might be the biggest stroke of luck any musical group has ever had.
These are things I’m thinking about as I’m trapped inside on another sunshiny day.
Still, I know I need the rest. Apparently stress and an overtaxed nervous system can cause vertigo. Not much of a shocker, there. So, I’m leaning in (finally). Much like I should have been doing for months.
On the one hand, I know that mental health is just… health. And on the other, I wish it wasn’t a lesson I needed to keep learning. Especially because I feel like I’m someone who’s very mental-health-conscious. I do the stuff—the healthy habits and the routines and the good mental maintenance.
But I’m not that good about rest and recovery (yet).
I’m working on it. And I know that actually becomes achievable by picking things up where I left off, rather than giving myself a hard time about it.
Our Daily MAP Year Prompt
230/365
What lesson do you keep re-learning?
onward.
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So sorry to read this, cheers to your recovery. ❤️🩹